It’s one of our main purposes on this earth in these bodies, to keep waking up our consciousness and awareness of all things, including ourselves of course.

This story has mixed blessings and lots of growth within it.

I had the wonderful opportunity to lead a massage class in the school I had learnt massage in the first place. I had grown loads, but the owner missed that and held me in stasis as the student who was being given a chance to co-instruct a large 25 person class with another leader who she felt was more knowledgeable, especially on the anatomy side of learning.

She was right about his level of knowledge on a more academic plane and mine was more healing, emotional, stretching our being-ness. As a team on paper we were set to be awesome instructors, especially if his ego could remain in check.

First day of class he showed up looking fit and athletic, with a bandana that said “Bad Ass” all over it energetically, while I was the slightly chubby, smiley loving energy that certainly didn’t afford respect from him. He was battling me from the moment we stepped into class.

He invited the class to speak their names aloud, sharing where they were from and why they were attracted to attending this school and this particular class. He then sent out a $1 challenge which was for him to name each student aloud bullet style. He named about 15 of them and then sent the challenge out to anyone else. The students all pointed at me, inviting my participation.

I am stunningly bad at remembering names and shrugged my shoulders, mentioning I would call in lots of help from the Angels. I immediately went around the circle saying their names and a little insight into who each of them were. There was silence and then cheering. It was a heck of a beginning, which sat well with the whole class and didn’t sit well with him at all. As class moved forward the individuals in the class invited me to share my gifts which had even more permission to open when I was at the massage tables, rather than in the big room of learning we all shared.

One student told me I was looking above her head while my co-teacher was talking anatomically about body parts we were about to massage. She asked what I was looking at, and I hadn’t been as aware of looking at all, so I went ahead and asked my guides if there was something I needed to tell her.

There was a man in an Air Force uniform behind her. He was dark and handsome and told me he was her father. She wasn’t very old herself and this seemed like wrong information. I told her what I saw and she burst into tears. Her father had passed while in military service when she was 2 years old. He let her know he was with her and so proud of the path she was taking. It was a very special moment we shared. There were many of these.

Meanwhile my co-instructor had an agenda of his own, which was to open his own school of massage and take some of the students with him, who really appreciated his level of actually fabulous clinical instruction.

He spoke against the owner behind her back and was quite out of integrity. One day I pulled him to one side and questioned his ethics. The next day the owner called me into her office, closed the door and accused me of all the things he had been doing to undermine and disrespect her school. I didn’t have a voice and she wasn’t into listening. She’d heard it from him directly and wasn’t willing to hear from me. She wanted me to leave.

I asked her if I could finish the class at least, as I’d grown close to the students, who had experienced great healing with the work that flowed through me. She would consider it and actually the students spoke up and asked that I complete with them at the planned retreat.

My co-teacher could barely look me in the eyes, as he knew what he had created and he knew it wasn’t his best or most honest reality.

The healing in the class, the tears of release and the hugs and love we exchanged were well worth it.

The class was awakened in a stunning manner, while my co-teacher threw me under the bus for his own gain. The reflection and contrast of life showed up with my own awakening right before my eyes, during that class. Ultimately it was a beautiful experience and I have no regrets. I was able to sleep at night with my own awakening, knowing I had done no harm to anyone else.

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Love & Blessings,

Ruth

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